My causes

I read this interesting article the other day found here.  It basically is a researcher highlighting male gender socialization.  When people are asked about the attributes of "real men", here's the box of typical results that ensues.  (WARNING, some of the information below near the bottom of the box is sexually explicit, so skip past it.)

Tall	Strong	Muscular
25-45 years old	Able-bodied	Heterosexual
Cisgender	Competitive	Dominant
Cop	Firefighter	Mechanic
Lawyer	Business Man	CEO
Caretaker	Competent	Leader
Drinks	Watches & plays sports	Play poker with his buddies
Doesn’t show emotions other than anger, excitement	Stoic	Violent
Always wants sex	Has lots of sexual partners	Sex is about scoring
Has a big penis	Gets hard when he wants	Stays hard
Gives his partner an orgasm (or multiple orgasms)	Ejaculates when he wants to	Sex is focused on intercourse, blow jobs (receiving), possible anal (giving)

Wheeee
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OK, ITS SAFE NOW.  (Though it's really not the bad, I promise.)

Anyone, basically, US society teaches or socializes men to believe that they must perform in certain ways (ways included in the box to be real men).  While many of the items are not really necessarily bad, many are downright troubling and some are so specific, they aren't really attainable by the average man anyway.  I will concede that a few are good attributes, but some men simple aren't born leaders or whatever. What especially troubles me is that a "real man" is violent, only shows the emotions anger/excitement, and is stoic.  Basically, "real men" are ticking bombs with big muscles that lack any sort of empathy, not to mention an unreasonable and unhealthy view of sex. 

Is it any wonder domestic violence is so prevalent?

Just a couple days after reading this article, I finally looked up the details about a colleagues death over the holidays.  At WHS, a fellow teacher died and I received an email without any details that she has passed away on Christmas Day.  Very very sad.  Then,  I found out that she had been killed.  Her ex had seen another man's car in her driveway and had confronted her outside her house.  They had "words" and then he punched her in the head.  He's a bodybuilder and therefore he fractured her skull and she died the next day from serious head trauma.  He drove off before ascertaining her condition.  Now, I don't think he actually intended to hit her to kill.  But, it could very well be that his go-to emotion (or only) was anger and "real men" respond with violence right?  He's being tried with 2nd degree murder.

This inspiring and spunky teacher had no reason to die.  And I can't help but wonder if society didn't try and squash all men into the "box" if things would've turned out differently for Prudence.  Perhaps, perhaps not, but I hope that we are not all naive enough to think that the "box" doesn't have a pretty big influence on the number of domestic violence incidents.

Anyway, this all segways into my causes.  I am a feminist.  I believe in equal rights for women.  One of the reasons I believe in fighting for true equality is because if women are treated as equals, we can allow men to be themselves as well.  They will no longer have to strive to fit into a box in order to not be teased or abused themselves.  The traditional distinctions between men and women would diminish, making it so more women can be CEOs and leaders if they choose and more men to be sincere about their emotions and needs as human beings. I also believe that if equality of the sexes is achieved, this will also greatly reduce the abuse of other groups of society, especially children, some of the most vulnerable and exploited human beings on the planet.  Also, all those who are different from the norm with be treated with dignity and respect, such as LGBTIQ people, and intersex people, and disabled people, and people of ethnic minorities.  I do my best to promote all of these causes, not just feminism, but I recognize that oppression of any form intersects with all other types of oppression.  Ending one greatly increases the chances of ending the others.

I am feminist.  I am against all forms of oppression.   I believe as I believe for people like Prudence.

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read: This Common Secret My journey as an abortion doctor by Susan Wicklund.
taste: A hot buttered drink ;)
see: A clean apartment, thx love. :D
hear: Micah's character conversations on SWTOR (computer game).
smell: pumpkin spice candle
touch: Micah's hugs after a long trying day dealing with our loss at WHS.
think: All the people out there being oppressed for things they cannot change.
feel: Better, now that I've spilled some of my guts.
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